Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Another Tuesday in the Bulg

11-21-2006

It is a cold overcast Tuesday afternoon in beautiful Chirpan Bulgaria. I just finished filling out a living allowance survey for the PC. They are thinking about raising our per diem because of foreseen inflation rates after the EU accession in 2007. I think we receive plenty of cash from PC, but a few extra bucks in my pocket would definitely help fund my recreational activities and trips abroad.
My friend Alex and I are starting to plan our trip to Africa. We are planning to head to Egypt next spring and then work our way down to Tanzania. When we get to Tanzania the plan is to Hike Mt Kilimanjaro. And after we summit the highest peak in Africa and make our way back down; we will reward ourselves by going to the world famous Carnivore restaurant. The Carnivore is an all you can eat buffet of exotic meats such as zebra and crocodiles. Well this trip is still a bit of a pipe dream at the moment because the PC salary of around $3,000 a year does not really leave room for a $2,000+ trip. I enjoy challenges and the more I read about Mt Kilimanjaro the more intrigued I am with conquering it. The main danger of the hike is the altitude; there is no way of knowing exactly how your body will react to 20,000 ft. I was talking to the head of USAID in Bulgaria my friend Bill about the hike last weekend. Bill told me that he had hiked Kilimanjaro 10 years ago; on the 30 year anniversary of his fathers Kilimanjaro conquest. He told me that the key is an incredibly slow pace and drinking lots of fluids. He said the guys walking at a normal pace were the same guys being carried down on stretchers. He also mentioned that toward the top you are literally going about 100yds an hour; any faster and your body will be overcome by the altitude. Well I will leave more to be said about my future Kilimanjaro adventure. I guess I should not get too excited about the trip until I can figure out a way to lock down the funding.
I apologize to those reading if my writing is less than entertaining. I sometimes have very little to write about, and end up writing out my less than interesting thoughts, ideas, and concerns as they come to me. Writing helps me evaluate and organize my thoughts, and provides a type of release of the pressure built up inside of me.
A couple weeks ago I gave my Colleagues ‘Pop Rocks’. It was quite entertaining watching there reactions to the candy. They could not stop giggling, and were eager to hand out the magical candy to unexpecting office visitors for a laugh of there own.
I somehow got the flu at about 4am on Sunday morning. It was a bit unusual how sudden the symptoms had hit me. I woke up at 1am and was perfectly fine, but when I woke up again at 3am to use the rest room I began to smell trouble. After I stood up I took one step and then suddenly lost all muscle control and fell to the floor. After I used the restroom I felt fine and went back to sleep; only to awake an hour later shivering. I knew I had the flu because I was constantly cold, and my muscles were aching. This two day sickness was quite a bit easier for me than last years weeklong painful and depressing flu spell. This year I was not alone, I had the comfort of my baba’s kindness. Throughout my sickness the baba brought me a constant supply of food water and mystery pills. She even did my laundry while I was under the weather. I can’t emphasize how blessed and thankful I am to have her around. It is quite comforting to know that she is there, and always willing to help in times of need. The Baba often emphasizes that she is always there to help because I am her son. And likewise she is my Bulgarian Grandma and I am always there for her when she needs me.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

This & That; nothing too exciting

11-14-2006

The weather has been lacking any form of stability lately; there have been bursts of heat mixed in with the cold. I made a very important purchase the other day; I bought a small heater for my extra room. Before I purchased this I had to carry my 70lb soviet era radiator style heater from my office/living/wardrobe room to my bedroom every night and then back the next morning. Regrettably this is probably the most exciting thing in my life at the moment. I have been a bit frustrated lately with Peace Corps life. The ups and downs are always unpredictable and seemingly more and more frequent. I can go from happy to mad at the world to horribly depressed within a few hours. The Peace Corps lifestyle definitely toys with emotions and provides an endless amount of challenges. Even other PCV’s make life harder at times; it is like being part of a 140 person high school. The amount of drama and gossip circulating is quite pathetic. I have found that the key is to hang out with people you know and trust, and stay away from large groups of PCV’s.
I am still having problems with work, I keep hoping that things will snap back into place and the problems will work themselves out. I get frustrated when I am in situations that are out of my immediate control. I like being in charge of all situations, and the feeling of helplessness bothers me to say the least. I am now playing the waiting game for much needed information and funds to come my way.
I am actually in good spirits today; I woke up on the right side of the bed, and have been able to quit feeling sorry for myself long enough to appreciate the situation I am in. Sometimes I forget that life is full of ups and downs, and it is not only this situation that is challenging. I have been through plenty of highs and lows throughout my life, and have learned to manage the stress adequately. The problem now is that most of my former stress relieving outlets are no longer available to me. I no longer have a close friend living with me that I can talk to everyday, or an abundance of friends nearby that I can meet for a beer at will. I am no longer able to stay connected with my immediate family by periodic visits (stealing food, doing laundry ect). There are a lot of things that I miss, and have learned to live without while living in the Bulg. And despite the tone of this blog, I am actually happy with my situation and am constantly recharged with enthusiasm to fulfill my hopes and dreams.

11-16-2006

Today has been a great day so far; the sun is shining and I finally received confirmation of consignment from the AIA. So now I can breathe easily because that major headache is now over. I have been a bit worried lately because if I had not been able to secure consignment from the AIA, it would be quite possible for this whole project to fall through. Project CURE had told me previously that they no longer work with Romania due to major corruption and customs irregularities. I have been told that the container will be packed and ready to ship by the end of the month. Which his great because it means that sometime in mid January my hospital will receive $530,00.00 of much needed medical supplies and equipment.
I know I have said this before and have done nothing about it, but I really feel the need to get involved with my Roma community. It is definitely easier said than done, but I don’t really have much of an excuse not to get involved. After January I will have loads of free time, and will need to find new things to fill my free time. I really feel for the Roma kids in town, they remind me of the forgotten children I once saw in Colombian orphanages. Today on the way to work I saw two Roma kids ages 5 &7 sharing a cigarette on a bench in the park. I laughed a bit when I saw this; but then realized that their situation in life was not something to laugh about. I often see a young Roma kid walking down my street pulling a small make-shift wagon by a small rope. The kid is around 8 years old and spends his days combing the dumpsters in the area for items to put into his wagon. It is a bit difficult to put into words some of the things I see everyday ( I think I am going to start walking around with my camera). It is not uncommon at all to see Roma sorting through dumpsters, but it definitely hits a nerve with me when I see the young kids doing it. It is as if they have no hope or chance at a future; instead of school they are looking through other people’s trash. Hopefully new government changes and regulations will help curb the seemingly endless cycle of poverty that the Roma endure. I think one thing that will undoubtedly change after EU accession is the way Bulgarians treat the Roma. Bulgarians have every opportunity to attend any school they want to. It is quite common for Bulgarian children from surrounding villages to bus into their nearest city everyday to attend the schools. But if one of the kids from the Mahala (Roma Slum) wanted to attend a Bulgarian school (even if it were only 1 mile away) it would be completely unacceptable. In my town the Roma school only goes up to 8th grade; which shows a pretty clear indication of when the average Roma’s education comes to a halt.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Ups & Downs

11-1-2006

It is 1:14 in the office right now, it’s not too cold because a beam of sunlight is shining through the window and penetrating my back. This is actually the first day I have been in the office all week. Motivation is hard to come by sometimes, my bum leg mixed with a bit of early winter depression makes it hard to get out of bed in the morning. But the sun is shining today, and my spirits are high, or at least higher than they have been in the previous few weeks.
My Peace Corps life has hit a brick wall and it has been frustrating trying to find a way around it. I have been waiting patiently for quite a long time for a grant to come through from USAID to fix the roof of a local medical center. I was approved for the money a couple months ago, but have not received it yet due to some delays in DC. It is a bit irritating because my municipality keeps asking me where the money is……but I have no answer. Things will fall in line soon I am sure, however the later we wait the more difficult it will be to begin construction on the new roof. The mid-winter weather in Bulgaria is not easy to work through.
I have also had a few problems with my large hospital project. I would say I am definitely still ahead of schedule due to the much needed help of my very ambitious, kind, and hard working grandmother who has taken it upon herself to personally raise funds for the transport of the container. I now have a packing list of exactly what supplies and equipment will be donated……..Value: $530,000.00. The problem at the moment is getting the tax free approval from AIA (agency for international aid) at the port. I am working hard to get all the paperwork inline for the transport and receiving of the 40ft container. It has been rather frustrating and challenging to come up with the appropriate paperwork in order for the AIA to cosign for the container, and to take responsibility for all of its contents. After a lot of emails and phone calls between CURE, AIA and myself I think we finally have all the required paperwork to get AIA to sign for the container. So at this point I think the problem is pretty much solved.(fingers crossed)
I have been feeling a bit down and out the last few weeks; I think my recent ankle injury has quite a bit to do with the depletion of my spirits. I have always used exercise and organized sports as an outlet for stress and anxiety. I guess this is why the last few weeks have been so difficult for me. I have been quite immobile and have not been able to get around as easily as I would like. I have wanted at times to walk to the store or to work; but have been reluctant to do so because of the pain I knew I would have to endure during the journey. I have a large, firm, and uncomfortable cast that goes up to my knee; and all I want is a simple walking cast to ease my mobilization and to allow me to wash my leg. I don’t think this is much to ask from Peace Corps medical, but I am now in a process of waiting for advice from Peace Corps medical in DC that would possibly overwrite the initial diagnosis and treatment strategy of the local doctor in Sofia. This is not something I can actually blame on PC; I am in a different country with different medical standards and treatment.( but I will vent anyway) I even have an official doctor’s note from my family physician in the states suggesting that I use a walking cast for the time being. The in Country Medical staff has been quite helpful for the most part, but the non-PC doctor in Sofia has definitely made my life a bit more challenging…Thanks for the cast Buddy! And for giving me crutches when released! (He didn’t) And for giving me a wheelchair to get to the X-Ray room 150yds away (he didn’t). Well OK now I feel better………anyways things are not as gloomy as they once were, I am sure I will get this cast off soon enough.
Well my best PC friend left me in the trenches of Bulgaria all alone……..he had a serious girlfriend in the states, and decided that it was time to head back home and continue his life there. I will definitely miss having Mitch around to share experiences with, but I also respect his decision.
Last weekend I went to Veliko Turnovo for a huge Peace Corps Halloween party. It reminded me a lot of a typical college party, which was a bit refreshing to say the least. Saturday I spent most of the day wandering around the beautiful city solo. Sometimes I just need a bit of alone time to clear my head, put things in perspective, and develop a future plan of action. Saturday night was quite a lot of fun; we all dressed up in wild costumes and consumed enough beer to kill a small army (all in safe and responsible way of course). After I arrived home on Sunday I was extremely exhausted; but had a much healthier and positive state of mind than I had before the weekend begun.
So I guess you can say things are looking up, and I am climbing back up the hill after the slump I was in. I am in the process of reevaluating a few things, and figuring out exactly what I expect and want out of my next year of volunteer service. As for new events of the future:
-I will begin a 3 month beard growing competition today with other PCVs
-I will take over management of the Peace Corps ARYF (at risk youth fund)
-I will start going to the gym regularly and using the exercise bike
-I will clean my house (maybe)
-I will learn to cook (maybe)
-I will find a new girlfriend to keep me warm this winter (hopefully)
Ok that’s enough for now; I will save a bit more rambling for another day.
In less than two months I will step foot on American soil…….very exciting!..... It will be a quite a momentous occasion for me. I have a feeling that it all might be a bit overwhelming, but I am sure I will get over it. And to all my friends out there……..we are going to have to hit up a Mexican restaurant for some delicious food and maybe a margarita or two. I miss you all and look forward to seeing you soon.

Az shte vishdam ti skorro (I will see you soon)
Psichko hubavo( Wishing all the best)

Trevor Lewis Lake